Lunch Lady Harley

Self-conscious Sunday

Warning: Contains rage, and body hate.

what really annoys me to no end, is the fact that I work my arse off at the gym, 8/10 times I eat healthy and smaller portions, I have a dance class once a week, and I go out on either short jogs or long walks rather frequently, not to mention my job more often than not is physically demanding, and here I am still as chubby as ever. Yet some bitch I know has the ability to lose all her excess body fat and tone up, while literally doing nothing and eating like a pig. How the fuck is that fair?! To all those people who are going to say “don’t worry about them, it’ll come back and get them later in life”, pipe the fuck down. I don’t care if it comes back to them later on in life, I feel like shit now. Also, don’t you dare tell me that “it’s just genetics”, genetics, you say, then why was my mum a size 6 at my age, and no other female in my family is/ was big while at the same age as I am. I am so sick of putting in efforts to get nothing in return. The worst part is, it doesn’t just effect me anymore, it effects Him, because I can’t feel comfortable enough in my own skin, so it ruins any and all intimate moments, especially when he tells me I am beautiful and its a bad body image day. It effects my friends, when they want to go out, I have to wear stockings and clothes with sleeves so I feel like I am hiding my body well enough, which then makes me unhappy that I probably don’t look as good as everybody else, and people stop inviting me places because they think I’m a stuck up bitch. Where does it end, because I am getting mighty tired of crying myself to sleep because I can’t feel comfortable in my own stretch-marked skin.